When Our Best Tools Are Just Out Of Reach

I’m all about building skills and collecting newer and better coping strategies to navigate the challenges of life.

Having an arsenal of tools at hand is necessary for eating disorder recovery and the work of moving away from dieting to more attuned, connected eating.

HOWEVER

Could it be that you have all the strategies, coping skills, mindfulness practices, and even the right passages from your sacred text as a constant prayer on your heart and you still can’t get those constant, obsessive critical thoughts quieted down and feeling of overwhelm calmed?

Depression, anxiety, obsessive thoughts, chronic sleep deprivation, trauma and other bigger issues snatch your toolbox and set it up on the highest shelf. Out of your reach. You can see your tools. You can know about your tools. But you cannot REACH your tools.

Maybe your arms are quite literally full, holding a baby, a toddler or figuratively full, holding the needs of a struggling teenager, a mid-life-crisising partner, or an aging parent. And those tools and the toolbox are so close, but out of reach.

Sister, if you are not yourself (despite your best effort or because you have no desire/capacity for effort):

• Please reach out to me, your doctor or mental health care provider for help. You don’t have to get through this part of your life by the skin of your teeth. Support with prescription medication, psycho-therapy or mental health counseling might be just the boost you need to be able to reach for and use all the tools in your toolbox.

• Give the finger to “self-care”. What you need is COMMUNITY CARE. Call a friend, your mom, your sister. Talk to the grocery checkout person, the gas station attendant, your child’s teacher. You don’t have to do this alone.